Monday morning I arrived to my dentist appointment, I walked in and got what I always do: huge smiles and welcomes accompanied by "how are you doings?" and "How is work goings?". This is always the kind of friendliness I recieve when I come to my dentist's office. The staff is absolutely amazing. I walk in, on the near side of a panic attack knowing that soon enough I will have to endure listening to these awful machines inside my mouth. (So weird, it has never been the actual work, but the sounds that make me nervous.) However, despite all of the nerves I wear so clear on my sleeve, I am always put at ease with the great attitudes of my dentist's office staff. I sit in the waiting room and watch as the other family that sits and waits as well receives the same greetings, well wishes, and we even exchange glances and smiles of our own. Fast forward, about 2 hours later, same day, cleaner teeth, excitement that I have survived, headed to my next appointment. Driving down a main street in my town to my eye doctor. I always look forward to seeing my eye doctor, he is awesome. I have no worries, except maybe the "puff of air" test. As I walk in to my appointment, I am met with a very different greeting. No smiles, no "how are you?", in fact, the staff seemed to be in a bad mood and I found them to be quite rude and unhelpful. None the less, I smile, say thank you and take my seat. As I sit in this waiting room, it is the same type of atmosphere, everyone just seems to be in a bad mood. People complaining of the wait times, people not even acknowledging people who would like to sit down.There was one person in the whole room smiling. An older woman, smiling at an adorable baby and what happened? The mother got up and moved across the room. There was such a difference that 2 hours and a drive across town made. Funny how the place that usually stresses me out had a good attitude and the place I felt at ease stressed me out.
Or could it be that the atmosphere was adapted from the first person they came in contact with as they walked into the office?
Did that stranger who did or didn't greet them properly as they walked in the door completely change the course of their day.
As I sat and waiting for my name to be called, I recalled a time that I was in San Francisco and was sent across the street to get some testing done for a follow up with my oncologist. I remember practically being in tears because of how rude the lady at the front desk was to me. There was so much going through my mind in regards to my Cancer at that moment, that the last thing I needed was someone being mean. I remember thinking, "THIS LADY! She knows that people who come through this door HAVE CANCER...she doesn't get to be rude!" But monday, as I reflected on that appointment, so many months ago, something hit me. I was so upset that she was being so rude when I was having a bad day, but, what was going on in her life that was making her have such a bad day?
This realization made me reflect on the type of stranger that I am to people. We expect so much from people ya know? We always want the best service, with the best attitude, at the best rate, and in the best timeframe possible. But how often are we ready to go above and beyond to provide the same things to other people.
How many people could you have walked by today, in every place that you went, and you didn't even know they were there? A deeper thought, how many people did you walk by today, that maybe really needed someone to acknowledge their existence, that maybe really needed just a simple smile, or needed someone to show just a little bit of kindness, but we just kept walking. Have our lives become so busy and our minds so focused on our "to do list" that we have lost sight of what and who is around us?
The thought of that is so sad, especially knowing that so many days, that is true for my life. However, I say with all of my heart, something I know to be true is this one thing: People are ALWAYS more important than your/my to do list.
My life has been, I guess you could say, hectic the last few years. And in the process of this time, although it may be so very legitimate because of what I have been dealing with, I have found myself to be so inward focused, forgetting that there are people in my life everyday, waiting for me to be that stranger that makes a difference.
Romans 2:4 says, "It is God's kindness that leads us to repentance."
It is so true. He is so kind. And in my reflection of him...Am I kind as well?
It is not very often in life that you have the opportunity to have a complete stranger change your life forever. I am honored to say that I have had that privilege.
Nearly 5 years ago, I was blessed with an incredible friendship in my life. It was one of those friendships you know is from the Lord. Little did I know, the blessing of his family, complete strangers, would be to me. The father of that friend, an incredible man named Bruce Sanzari, forever changed my idea of how I treated each person that came into my life.
I remember the first time I met Bruce. I was greeted with a smile that could make the meanest person in the world instantly nice. It was a genuine one. But his smile was not the only thing that was genuine about him. EVERYTHING about him was genuine. His whole person was an out pour of his faith and the same way that he knew his Lord was kind, he was as well. In the first conversation we shared, he asked the typical, "so what do you do with your life?" question. But he wasn't wanting the "oh you know, work, school, ministry" response. He genuinely wanted to know about me, and where I was. It was so refreshing. Then, when I met his lovely wife, and two of his daughters, I realized the legacy that lived in his family, because they were exactly the same. Friendship is so easy to build when you know people care. Bruce joked with me life I had been a friend from his childhood. He would crack jokes about me, about his son, he would talk trash about my football team. It wasn't about the amount of time he had known me, it was about the simple fact that, now he knew me. And because he knew me, it was his responsibility to love me. And isn't that what Christ had called him to do? To love people? When I was diagnosed with Cancer, my friend Brady, would tell me constantly that I was in his and his families prayers, and I knew it was true. Because that is who they were. This family, I had met once, who were pretty much strangers to me, kept me in their prayers. Asked God for favor on my behalf. Though they didn't have to, they did. I remember the first time that I had seen the Sanzari family in a long while. I visited their church and I sat anxiously through the service waiting to be able to say hello. The first person I saw was Bruce. Of course, I was greeted with a hug, a joke about football, and that same smile that let me know I was apart of his family of friends he built by the incredible gift God gave him to be able to love people. And it was the same as I began to see the rest of his family. I had the privilege of enjoying lunch with them that day before I came home. Sitting and talking with Bruce, Trisha, and one of their daughters, Michaela, was such a blessing. A lunch that will forever hold a special place in my heart.
The day that my friend called to tell me his dad had gone home to be with the Lord was a devastating day. Not just to his family, not just to me, but to this world. Because he was such a jewel. Although, I do not know why God does the things that he does or when they happen, I do know that on that day, his heart was broken too. Bruce was a purposeful stranger. He didn't care who you were, where you had been, or where you were going. He just cared about you. Because you were a person and you crossed his path, you were important. I remembered how heavy God had put the Sanzari family on my heart the day before and I remember asking God to be with them. And He was. He always had been. Every time I saw them, he was with them. He was in the way that Bruce loved people, and in the way Bruce had taught his family to love people, God and Bruce were in them, and with each person that they come in contact with, a piece of God is left behind, and a piece of the legacy of a professional and incredible stranger is left behind as well. Bruce, you loved people well, and I pray that I can be half of the blessing you were to me to those I come in contact with every day. Thank you for teaching me to be a purposeful stranger.
You see, much like I learned from my friend, God has called me to love people. And although, on most days, I feel like I come up short, the call doesn't change.
I want to be a stranger that SEEs people. That loves them. Because people matter.
As I walked out of my eye doctors appointment, I stopped at the desk, thanked the ladies for their time and let them know I hoped they had a great day. It could have made a difference, it could not have, but I do know that I was a kind stranger.
To most we are strangers. But to one, we could be the person that changes everything.
It's MY kindness Amanda, that leads you to repentance.
It's MY kindness Amanda, that you are to reflect and live out.
Therefore,
It's your kindness Amanda, that can change a person's day.
It's your kindness Amanda, that can change a person's life.
It's your kindness Amanda, that can change an atmosphere.
It's MY kindness, through you, that can lead them to repentance.
What would the world around you look like if you became a purposeful stranger?
